After he left, I figured I'd start the day off right by making the best use of my time. I'd hop right up out of bed, grab a fresh cup of coffee, and slap on a DVD. Because I didn't have access to a TV or DVD player, I spent the next ten minutes googling how to open the CD tray on a Mac. Unfortunately, I was unable to follow through with my plan due to some technical difficulties.
When I got over the initial disappointment, I decided the day could still be spared. Instead of crawling back under the covers and crying softly about my wasted potential, I got in my car and drove home. I arrived safely and promptly decided to reward myself with some pancakes. This decision proved nearly disastrous when I discovered we were out of butter. Luckily, I eventually found some in the refrigerator.
I spent the rest of the morning doing laundry, cleaning the bathroom, and watching Gilmore Girls. I also did five reverse sit-ups and a few sun-salutations that I learned in yoga. Then I decided it was finally time to take some action and get to writing. Except first I was hungry so I had to make a bag of sweet potato fries and some garlic mayonnaise to dip them in.
Once my hunger was satiated, I got dressed and left the house for my favorite combination coffee shop and writing spot. But there was a really interesting radio program on in the car about the effects of stress on the human body, so I had to drive around for twenty or so minutes before parking. When I got out and started walking, the whole world suddenly went funny and the left side of my body felt numb. “Oops!” I thought. “Must have inhaled too many chemicals while cleaning the bathroom this morning! How silly of me.” To avoid a full blown hypochondria-induced public melt down, I quickly headed back to my car. I didn't feel like I could walk in a straight line, but driving was no problem.
From here, I had to make some quick decisions about the best course of action. I knew I needed to get out of the scrutiny of the public eye and to the relative safety of my home, and soon. First, though, I needed to pick up something sweet to make myself feel better after that close call. I started driving toward McDonalds, knowing that an Oreo McFlurry would do the trick. A few minutes later in the drive-thru line I panicked slightly about being stuck in an enclosed space, so I backed right up out of there and straight to a nearby liquor store for a pint of Ben and Jerry's. Another close call.
Back at home, I decided it would be best not to take any more chances. I gathered up all the animals at my house, got under a blanket, and turned on the TV. Soon enough, the pint of ice cream (and the rest of my sweet potato fries from earlier) were in my belly and I was feeling fine.
In all, I learned a lot today. Like, sometimes you just have to resign yourself from the outside world and not feel bad about it. And also, don't mix chemicals in an enclosed space.